Why am I having 3rd thoughts about having a Girl friend?

I am having a cool time here at my work place. I have reclaimed my position as Mr.Nerd or something near the Omniscient (Thanks to Dr.Scheme). Naturally I have at least a few ppl now, who care to talk to me, and yes of course a few girls.

Naturally again, I have been questioned on being committed. I am not sure, whether I am assuming things, or whether they are really surprised, when I give the obvious answer that I am single.

This goaded me into writing why am I single? I am not single because,
I am not Handsome, or
I am in a pathetic economical condition, or
I am good for nothing, or
I am too numb to feel love.

May be a few of these things about me are true(it's upto you to choose which ones), but the reason I am single is not because of one of those above stated reasons.

I am working in a widespread IT company and I don’t have a city to call it as my city.

Let’s say that my girl friend (assuming that I manage to have one) is in another city.
Total Monetary Expenses in a month:
1. Phone Bill (approx) 1500INR
On an average let’s say that the total call duration, that I make in a day to her, sums up to 100minutes. Even with STD boosters, in India, an STD calls costs at least 50P per minute.
50P x 100 = 50INR per day.
50 x 30 = 1500 INR
(If you use idea and walk while you talk, this will be a good exercise. Yet an expensive one.)

2. I will have to visit her at least once in a month. With my work pressure, I have two choices to take a train on the Friday night or a flight on the Friday evening.
Train:
Net charges for the to and fro journey may vary from 2500 – 5000 INR.
*Exclusive of medical charges that I will have to incur, as long journeys make me sick.
Flight:
Net charges for the to and fro journey may vary from 5000 – 11000
Stay:
At least in India you can’t stay at your girl friend’s place.
The most economical option will cost at least 500INR for 2 days.
Net expenses 5000(approx) + 500 + 500(Miscellaneous) = 6000 INR

3. You can’t evade away from paying the restaurant bills during that weekend.
Assume that I pay 4 Bills that weekend. The worst part is it should be some place, where you pay for the place rather than the food.
Lunch/Dinner for the 2 of us would cost at least 400 (*Exclusive of deserts)
(400 + 100(Desserts)) x 4 = 2000 INR

4. At least once in 2 months, I should buy her a dress or some expensive gift to keep her reminded of me, despite the calls I make everyday.
Let’s assume that gift/dress costs 2000 INR every 2 months.
2000/2 = 1000 INR per month

So the total expenses for maintaining a girl friend = 1500 + 6000 + 2000 + 1000
= 10,500 INR per month

Imagine a guy who makes not more than 20 grand a month. How do you expect him to spend more than half his salary on just his girl friend?

Let’s assume that I get a non-bitchy girlfriend, who shares half my expenses. Even then I have to spend 25% of my salary.

In the rest 15K, I should pay for my expenses viz., house rent, food, clothes, my regular phone bill, gadgets and lots more of other miscellaneous expenses.

Forget sending some money to my parents, at least I should live without sucking more money from them. I have sucked their hard earned money for the past 2 decades.

Let’s ignore the economical factors. Now look at the Time (is gold) factor. I should spend at least 2 hours of my active time in a day for her, and at least 1 hour in dreaming about her.

In a month I spend 30 x 3 = 90 of my daily hours = 3.5 days(Aprox)
1 Weekend with her = 2 days.
Net time spent for maintaining a girl friend = 5.5 days a month.
5.5 x 12 = 66 days in a year. 66/365 = 18.08%
1/5th of my total time on just mashing with her. (I wonder whether I have enough things to talk about! May be she can handle that.)

After all these do you still expect me to have a girl friend?

One day at the Call Centre

Recession has hit me hard. I could no more enjoy the blissful environment at home with the neighbors looking upon me as ‘Did he really complete his B.E. from CEG?’ So I made a resolution that I would no more remain unemployed. So I immediately started off to Chennai with hopes of getting a job at least some job.

I decided that I am more of a mouth person than a hand one. (Hey no double meanings) So I choose call centers than software companies. I gathered a few addresses from the Internet. I planned my schedule for the week.

I also dreamed of those call center cuties, who are supposedly easy targets. Well I started off from Saidapet to Velachery in 5A. I saw the commercial boards addressed as ‘Velachery Main Rd’ and got down at a deserted stop.

I was confused and enquired about the company.

“Well I don’t know whether there is any such company in this road like that.”

“Isn’t this velachery main road?”

“Well there is another road near Gurunanak college. You better try that.”

I got another bus on his guidance and got down after 2 stops. Again there was no clue. I enquired another guy. He looked at me as some country brute, who had just got down in Chennai Though I was dressed in neat formals with my 2000INR woodland cut shoes.

He gave clear instructions on how to reach the company and guided me into another bus. I reached the company early around nine to find out there was already half a dozen people waiting. Mostly guys. I tried not to get disappointed as there were a few good looking employees with my thoughts reeling to the movie ‘Yaradi Nee Mogini’

We were guided into a hall. Within a few minutes the hall was full with two dozens of candidates. We had a grammar test with 20 questions like ‘_______ sun rises in the east’.

I double checked my answers not fearing that I would not clear the first round, but fearing that I don’t want to embarrass myself by giving a wrong answer to any of those questions.

More than half of them didn’t make it to the next essay writing round. Now there were nearly 50 people in the next batch taking the first round. The HR person in her final attempt “We are recruiting for a domestic voice process and the salary is between 5 and 6 and there is no pick up and drop facility. You may have to work in roatational shifts.”

None seemed to be turning back. I finished my essay after all what have I learned in 4yrs of B.E. to fill the pages with stories. I was called in for the interview after a long wait. I wondered whether it’s a test for patience.

A fat elderly man, “Take your seat”

I sat down, “Thank you.” In a soft tone.

Interviewer: “Which college are you from?”

Me: “CEG”

EM: “CEG??!?!?”

Me: “Yes College of Engineering Guindy”

EM: “You mean the Guindy College?”

Me: “Yes”

EM: “The one in Chennai!!!”

Me: “yes” (Confused)

EM: “B.E. CSE from CEG!!!”

Me: “Yaaasss” (Wondering what’s so wrong!!!)

You know what happened next. He rejected me stating that I am over qualified.

Recession Vs Charmee

I watched a movie after a very long time. Yup it has been more than a week, more than 200+ hours. I don’t know what on earth kept me so busy (lol).

Anyways today I watched the movie ‘Ladam’. We enjoyed the movie. Though the climax was a little dull it doesn’t matter. In general the movie was thrill, fun and enjoyable.

The best thing about the movie, Charmeeeeeee. Man I got obsessed. Myself and Achu started hallucinating at her exemplary well distributed beauty.

For every seen we esp. I felt like she is pinching my lil heart. For her every move we got completely moved.

At a point we got so envious about the hero that we even prayed he would better die at the hands of the villains. When Charmee kissed the hero we could hear our hearts break.

Near the end of the movie I decided I will give mom a copy of Charmee’s pic and ask her to look for a girl as beautiful as she is or at least half as beautiful as her.

Just then I realized, How long will it take for TCS to call me in? How long will I stay there before being kicked out? How long it will take for me to look for another job?
Finally what, where and how will I be after half a decade even if mom manages to find such a girl by then?

Recession destroyed all my dreams. No, no it stopped me from dreaming. I am now rolling on my bed unable to forget Charmeeeeeeeeee and regretting recession.

Recession Mocks me :-)

Some of you must know I got placed in TCS. I may very well have got placed in a so called dream job but for various reasons I preferred TCS and wanted to stay with TCS.

But it was not until a couple of months before that rumors about we getting called in will take nearly an year. So I decided to look for an alternative or at least a temporary job to keep me occupied.

So I registered with Naukri. I got 100s of mail recommendations and I did apply for them. Then last Monday I got a mail calling for a E-Commerce or business consultancy kind of a company. The profile sounded interesting but there is no mention about the package.

I seldom bothered the package and hence I decided to give it a try owing to the interesting job profile. The recruitment process was scheduled to happen for 3 days. I went in the afternoon of the 2nd day, wondering whether all the vacancies been filled.

There was a written test for 1 hr 15mins. Some aptitude questions and then verbal ability and then a 3 page essay writing. I completed the entire thing in 30-35mins. Feeling pride about my CAT preparation and my blogging abilities that I wrote the essay emotionally till the last line of the 3rd page provided.

My friend who sucks in English didn't make it to the interview. They also rejected many others. I was feeling proud about myself.

After a long wait I was called in for an interview. An avg looking lady may be around 26 or so, single for sure interviewed me. The interview was over before it started anyway I still boasted about my analytical and managerial skills :P

Then came the funniest part. I was explained the job timings and the compensation package. The work is for 8hrs a day for 6 days in a week. If I choose night shift it is 5 days a week with some 50INR allowance a day. The job is a temporary one as I am still a student with a compensation around 5K.

I acquiesced, thinking that may be once I finish my degree in a month or 2 get my certificates and they make me permanent with a better package. Even 10-15K a month is better than me staying idle at home.

After an hour or so came the offer letter. Another cute lady of the same age group explained the procedures to join etc. I asked her about the pay hike once I get there permanently. She coolly said there will be no changes in the package. LOL :D

I would have laughed at her but unfortunately my chivalry stopped me from snubbing at her. I grimly walked out with my offer letter wondering whether I should feel it humorous or horrific.

After all the 14yrs of schooling and 4yrs of dying in this hell I get a job that pays only 5-6K a month. I would better stay idle with an engineering degree than mocking myself and the institute from which I am about to graduate.